Don’t be afraid to utilize assets when dealing with the death of a loved one

By Kayla Lemay

Comment Staff

Flowers are placed at memorials and grave sites as a way of remembering the deceased and saying goodbye to them. Photo - User 4028mdk09 on WikiMedia
Flowers are placed at memorials and grave sites as a way of remembering the deceased and saying goodbye to them. Photo – User 4028mdk09 on WikiMedia

When a loved one dies, whether it be a family member, a friend, or even a pet, it’s amazing how much grief we go through.

Feeling lost and upset is entirely natural – don’t let anybody tell you otherwise. It may be months, even years, since you’ve lost a loved one, and the memories may come back when you least expect it. It’s perfectly normal and okay to be sad when this happens.

We all handle this grief in different ways, but some ways are much healthier than others.

One of the best ways to do it is talking it out. At Bridgewater State University, we have a well-staffed Counseling Center with walk-in hours every day for those in need.

Counselors offer the benefits of having been trained to deal with problems, and they come equipped with plenty of knowledge and advice to give to allow you to get back on your feet.

Even if you aren’t comfortable talking to a counselor, venting to a friend can be just as helpful. There’s something cathartic about getting problems off of your chest.

Another great way to handle grief is to keep a journal. Keeping a journal is just like venting to a friend or speaking with a counselor – you get the negative feelings off of your chest, but you don’t have to worry about burdening another with your problems, if that’s your biggest fear.

It’s important that you take care of yourself when you’re struggling. Take a day to just sit and lose yourself in a good book, a fun video game, or go out with friends in a fun and safe place to get your mind off of what’s happened.

Some might enjoy going to a sports game, or having a spa day and getting their nails done. Going to see a good movie or playing games at an arcade are also some great options to enjoy yourself.

Most importantly, remember this person fondly for who they were when they lived. Each person leaves a legacy when they pass away, and many people do wonderful things to touch our lives.

“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened,” Dr. Seuss once said. This quote can apply to a number of things, and when a loved one passes this fits perfectly.

Never forget how they made you happy and how they impacted your life. You learned valuable lessons from the ways you interacted with them, and wherever a person may go after death, you can know that they wouldn’t want you to be sad – they would want to see you go on and do amazing things.

For those needing to speak to a counselor, the BSU Health and Wellness Center is located in Weygand Hall and is open from 9:30 a.m. – 4:30 p.m. Monday through Friday.


Kayla Lemay is the General Assignments Editor at The Comment. Follow her on Twitter @klemay123 or email her at


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