Ode To Men In March

Happy National Women’s Month! As controversial as this might sound, I think we need to prioritize men this month. I mean, it’s the least we could do. I feel like men don’t get the recognition they deserve, so I decided to dedicate this Ode to them.

Honestly, they are so selfless that you don’t even need to ask them for help. Like, once I was talking about football in a dining hall and a frat boy (heart eyes, am I right) overheard and started asking me questions about some game from 1996 and reminded me that I don’t know what football is. I forgot I was supposed to be mindless when it came to sports. I’m glad he was able to keep me in check!

Also, can we talk about what they do for our country? I mean, I understand what people are saying when some male politicians try to dictate women’s health, but they really aren’t that bad! When you look past the misogyny, homophobia, pompous attitude, corruption, and alpha-male mindset, they seem pretty cool!

I previously wanted to become a politician, but I think it’s for the best that I don’t. I talked about it once in a history class, and a guy in my class informed me that women are too emotional and irrational for politics. I guess he’s right. Hope he’s doing okay, last I heard from him he had started screaming and destroying all his gaming equipment because he died in Call of Duty. I guess he got a concussion from hitting himself with the controller.

Shame.

Ultimately, it’s the little things they do that really makes me admire them. From whistling at me to bestow an innocent compliment to helping me stay healthy by telling me to order a salad, men really just want us to know how much we mean to them. I can’t express my gratitude enough!

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